Windows unable to check for updates - says service not started (even though the service is started)

I've seen a few Windows 7 machines that have Windows Update problems where the machine says the service is not started even the service is started.  When this happens, the computer can no longer check for updates and it'll go indefinitely without checking for updates. The fix is to wipe out the update cache and then check for updates again.

The process as described here:

Stop the Windows Update process
Delete the content from c:\windows\softwaredistribution
Start the Windows Update process

Check for Updates.

I also recommend that you make sure the system is set to install updates for all Microsoft products as well.  To do that, open Internet Explorer and put microsoft.com in the Compatibility View sites.  Then go to http://update.microsoft.com/microsoftupdate in IE.   

Windows 7 not installing updates

As of March 2017, I rarely ever touch a Windows 7 machine anymore, but I did today, and the machine was checking for updates over and over again.  I googled and found a solution in my case (below).  The machine I was working on had installed updates in October 2016.  In general, I'd say my process for updating Windows 7 machines is this:

Install the convenience update if the most recent updates were older than April 2016

If the convenience update is installed, then I'd recommend these commands from an elevated command prompt:

net stop wuauserv
net stop cryptSvc
net stop bits
net stop msiserver
ren C:\Windows\SoftwareDistribution SoftwareDistribution.old
ren C:\Windows\System32\catroot2 catroot2.old
net start wuauserv
net start cryptSvc
net start bits
net start msiserver

update rollups for Windows 7 or other OSes (convenience updates)

If (for some reason) Windows update isn't working, which oddly I've seen a couple times in the last week when I needed to update Windows 7 in advance of a Windows 10 update (the checking for updates progress bar just cycles and cycles for hours) . . .

You can install update via a "convenience" update.

As an example, here's a convenience update for convenience update for Windows 7 and Windows 2008:

https://support.microsoft.com/en-us/kb/3125574

Before installing the update, install the April 2015 servicing stack update from here:
https://support.microsoft.com/en-us/kb/3020369

Also - you may need to stop the "Windows Update" service so that the convenience update does not try to check for existing updates since the Windows Update service has already shown instability.

Keep Windows 7 from installing drivers updates

I found these steps for keeping Windows 7 from installing driver updates.  This is particularly important for Toshiba Portege laptops that can become unstable with non-Toshiba approved drivers (particularly video, WLAN, and audio).

https://support.microsoft.com/en-us/kb/2500967

I follow the steps above on all Toshiba laptops.

Disabling WSUS on a formerly SBS 2008 network

Windows SBS 2008 networks define the Windows Update server as the SBS 2008 server.  This works well until you decommission the SBS 2008 server, and you need/want your computers to start searching for updates on the internet again.  Personally, I've found that as long as you have sufficient bandwidth, I prefer getting updates from the internet over managing/maintaining an internal WSUS server.  I'm sure many disagree with me.

The WSUS server is defined in Group Policy.  The Group Policy Object on an SBS 2008 network is called "Update Services Common Setting Policy."  Here's a screen shot of where you disable the setting (change the value to disabled):

Fixing 800B0001 in Windows Update on SBS networks

If receiving 800B0001 errors on domain connected machines on your SBS 2008 network, it's because an update had strengthened the communication channel between the machine and the SBS server and broken the connection.

Ignoring the absurdity of the issue, the fix is to run an update on the SBS box.  This page talks about it (you can ignore the portions about NLB - network load balancing for your SBS box):
http://support.microsoft.com/default.aspx?scid=kb;en-us;2720211

In essence, the resolution is to download this:
http://www.microsoft.com/downloads/details.aspx?FamilyId=2ba0b137-d85b-4734-9a95-11a04004a355

and run this command from an elevated command prompt:

WSUS-KB2720211-x64.exe /q C:\MySetup.log